Monday, March 24, 2008


The sun is shining, and it's time to accentuate the positive: let's talk about some things I've been thankful for lately.

1. Crazy friends that will travel thousands of miles with me to walk around aimlessly in a city they have never been to. Luckily for me, it was San Diego, so there was plenty to do. And plenty to eat.

2. People that speak intentionally with awkward voices and noises. This especially works when you speak LOUDLY.

3. Parents that make me lunch every day.

4. A boyfriend that says, "Stay in bed while I make breakfast."

5. People that I have only met a time or two taking the time to see me when I'm generally in their neck of the woods...only an hour away. Three times in one week.

6. Randomness in drive-thrus at 2am. Yelling, "I love you!" so many times that the drive through attendant says, "I love you too." comes to mind.

Have a happy day!

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Pay it forward...

With all the hustle and bustle of life that I experience (just like everybody else), sometimes it's easy to forget about the little things that matter. I have been teaching so much that I have forgotten those little things.

I have people that attend my classes for me, not for anybody else. I hope that someday, they go for themselves, but it is so humbling that they are so dedicated to the way that I teach. I have realized that when I teach, my problems go away for a little while. That feels so nice.

Despite our differences, my parents are so supportive. One of my sisters is having some serious problems with her in-laws, and it has made me realize how important it is to have loyal parents. Not everyone has that advantage.

And despite the enormous headache it is, I have the opportunity to be back in school to pursue a dream I didn't realize I had until a few months ago. I am SO TIRED. But after this semester, I only have 2 left, then it's on to my internship. There will be a summer in there for some rest, and I think that will help a lot.

After feeling down for the past couple of months, I just don't feel like I have the right to continue to feel bad about my life. I may not be sure where I am going, but I certainly have the tools to succeed wherever I end up!

Wednesday, March 12, 2008


Not all the way of course, but I'm feeling much better. I had a good, long talk with my counselor today and we are working on a few things to get me in the healthy mindset I need to be with relationships. Somehow, some way, I will be able to fill that void I feel, and I will fill it myself. Right now, it seems like a daunting task, but I trust that I will be able to do it. I've come a long way.

Spring break is approaching and I am so excited! I am glad that I will be spending time with my good pal, instead of the boyfriend. It's just too soon for that, but we were thinking about going on a trip...I will have to save that for another time.

On a lighter note, I was able to work in RICHARD SIMMONS and CHUCK NORRIS into a speech I did today. Boy, am I good at public speaking! I hope your day is half as good as his, because you know no one is quite as happy as Richard Simmons.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008


Don't you hate it when you realize that something is bothering you...after it has been for a long time? That's how I've been feeling for the past few days.

After my sister's mental breakdown over a year ago, I sought counseling since the circumstances were difficult for me to deal with. The counselor I saw was awesome, and helped me a lot. I guess I thought it was all I needed, and the effects of the situation were over, but I was wrong.

The thing is, I completely lost my best friend. That one person that I could tell anything to, and would feel zero judgment. The one that was always there. Since this whole ordeal, this void has slowly been effecting my relationships with others; I am constanly seeking a replacement and placing people in a position where they don't belong. I had expected everything to get back to normal, but this will effect our relationship for the rest of our lives. The medication she needs to maintain a normal life keeps her emotionally distant, and emotions in general are difficult to express. The vibrance she used to show is quelled, and I understand it is for the best since her lows were just as, or even more extreme.

Now that I udnerstand this, it's hard to figure out where to go next. I am in the process of re-evaluating many of my friendships and a romantic relationship that began a few months ago. You have to begin somewhere, right? Wish me luck. Hopefully I won't cry so much tomorrow. (It doesn't help that I'm PMSing rigt now either!)

I know this is a generally sad post, but I felt a need to get things out. I'm okay, believe me. Just a little stressed and emotional...sounds like a busy student! :p